Spent the day with Bella :)

We decided to make Halloween cupcakes :P was pretty fun lol and not so messy :)

she let me play with her hair :P

The finished product......

The before and afters

So I decided to paint my room this week...such a fucking task! If I knew it was gonna be all this work, I would have waited lol Anyway..the tree looks HORRIBLE but Im stuck with it for now lol

The after pics :)

My back, arms and feet were so damn sore afterwards lol I do LOVE the blue color and may paint over the tree or just re-do it darker. 

Spoiled lil girl lol

Bella got her iPad3! I don't even have one lol She was shocked lol Ken wrapped it and put it in a bag then put it in an air mattress box and when she opened it she actually thought she got an air mattress and even though she was disappointed on the inside she smiled and said she loved it like it was the best present she could have gotten lol she's so sweet. She was so shocked to see it :P

Happppppy Birthdaaaaaaaaaaaay Belllllllllllllllllllllla!

It amazes me

how someone who claims to love or care about you can talk to you like you're shit. To mock you and intentionally piss you off. Nice huh? Im so over all this bullshit, not the first person to do it and probably not the last. Does make you wonder if anything that was said was the truth. So angry and hurt but I'm not gonna let it get to me right now..gonna make a drink and have a vicodin :)


Bella's b-day is tomorrow :) she's gonna be 10 and growing up sooo fast blaaahh. I plan on going over after she gets out of school and hang out with them. She doesn't want a party (shocking) and wants pizza and cake for dinner lol I wish I could keep her a child forever.


I skyped with him today..felt good..good to see him smile and I said I wouldn't cry and I didn't lol Maybe I need a break from the net (like that would happen pfft) but seriously..if I could just get away from it all then maybe I would be better? I dunno..


here's Hannah and Bella with a cake/kitkat/m&m cake Amanda's friend made lol

Someone cut my credit cards

I can't believe I spent $150 on fucking curtains :O :O :O at least after I paint it will look nice :) So I will have lots of before, during and after pics. I am attempting a tree mural too *fingers crossed* I hope that it turns out well :S I'm actually excited lol my first home project on my own lol Thank GOD my mom is letting me charge the paint and supplies on her Lowes card...didn't think it would cost so much pfft. So wish me luck and expect tons of pics later this week :P


ohhh Monday is Bella's birthday and I still need to get her one more thing..just don't know what to get her. She's so hard to buy for now..not a 'kid' anymore but not grown either *sighs*

Bella and her friend Hannah :)

I got flowers!

I came to work on Friday and someone told me I had flowers :P Krishna had roses delivered to me for helping to make icons for his website :) they were so pretty and I loved the attention haha

So now Im off til the 29th woohoo! I will be doing lots of painting this week and Bella's bday is on Monday (still have to get her one more gift) and Tanya's bday is next Saturday. I know I won't want to go back to work after having 10 days off :S blah I need my sugar daddy so I don't have to work lol OHHHH and one more month til my b-day! the big 4 0 :O

ugh..

I am sooo stuffed :S we all went to Olive Garden and I had salad and cheese ravioli and feel like I am about to explode lol Gonna get on the bike in a few to burn some off :P

Ok..so I have off next week and am going to paint my room and the bathroom. If I feel brave enough I will do the dining room too lol now I just have to figure out what color I want to do..I know I want a blue with chocolate curtains (Like Jen lol) and dunno about the bathroom (anything will be better than that yellow lol). So wish me luck *fingers crossed* I don't think I will do such a bad job, I mean I've painted before and how  hard can it really be lol Will definitely take before and after pics.

Had a good cry today..

I talked to Mahir today..well not 'talked' but you know. It felt good..made me cry but in a good way :) It felt like we hadn't been distant at all and I loved that. I missed him and I needed this a lot.

Yesterday was dads b-day and I had to work :( I miss him so much and just wish we could relive that night so things could have been different :(  It's just so hard to move on.

Before I start crying again Im gonna change the subject..took Bella to see Hotel Transylvania and she loved it :) it was cute. Speaking of movies :P Jen, Mackenzie, Tanya and I are going to the Twilight Marathon on 11/15 and then seeing the last part of Breaking Dawn...over 12 hours at the theater lol we are crazy

Moms surprise party went well :)

She definitely had no clue :P I thought it turned out well and the twins were as cute as ever :) wish daddy could have been here for it :( I know she was missing him so much..especially with his birthday coming up next weekend.

LOL Bella is spending the night and drooling all over my pillows! She talks in her sleep too and is farting up a storm haha. Ugh she's growing up soo fast :( I want her to stay a kid forever :/

Allergies suck ass

They really do lol tired of sneezing, having watery eyes, itchy throat, etc..blah it makes me whiny lol So be warned!

Mama's birthday dinner at PF Changs was nice..Bella's dying to tell her about the surprise party on Saturday lol Here's a few pics from the night..me and my horrible double chin ugh..my sister needs to learn to take pics from a higher angle lol

Off for the weekend..5am now so I guess I need to carry my ass to bed *yawns* g'mornight